Sunday, April 13, 2008

summer schmummer bummer

My first non-academe work has taught me the importance of summer vacation. And how going to the beach when temperatures reach the high 30s should be a basic human right.

I currently work in Pasay, near Manila Bay. Every time I see the (dirty) ocean, I think, "So close, yet so far away..."

*****
The 'rents were here Wednesday til late evening today. I love my mom and dad, but thank god they're now back in Iloilo. Whew.

But! I have kuwento. It's funny.

Before I went to college, my dad had sat me down to talk to me about sex. Or the not having of sex. He started with "No boyfriends for now, okay?" then proceeded to "Well, I understand you might meet someone. If you decide to enter into a relationship, no sex!" which metamorphosed into "But sex is good. And sometimes making out can lead to the point-of-no-return. So make sure you're protected!" which in turn confused the hell out of me. I told him, "Dad, you just moved from "no boyfriend" to "practice safe sex" in 5 minutes. Give me a bottom line!"

To which he replied threateningly, "Don't come home pregnant!" So I thought, "Hmmm, so I can actually get knocked up. Just don't go home."

Toto, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore.

*****
But here's the real kuwento. During my parent's stay here, my dad asked me, "So when can we expect a grandkid?" I pointed to my sister, the one who has a boyfriend (and regular sex, more to the point), "Why not ask her?"

My dad, in his incredible logic tells me, "But you're the first-born. You should be first."

Which I had to clarify. "You just want grandchildren, right? Not necessarily a son-in-law, right?"

And my dad goes, "Yeah, just grandkids. You don't have to get married to get pregnant, do you?"

*****
I take it back. My parents are the coolest parents in the whole wide world! They're mad I drink, they're mad I smoke, but obviously I can have all the sex I want. Woohoo.

4 comments:

sarski said...

wow, drey! can we switch parents? heheheh, just kidding. i'm happy with my own parents because they're exact opposites of each other. my mom is the seemingly conservative type, does all the preaching but is very adaptable when things don't turn out like she wants them to. my dad is the very silent type, makes you do whatever you want as long as you're responsible for all of your actions but is (indirectly) more conservative than my mom. i guess that explains the fact why i am a person of many contradictions :D

crystal_farmer said...

drey, i was on the phone with my mother some nights back, and she said, out of the blue: i'm not as conservative as i used to be. i'm a bit liberal now. i burst out laughing. apparently, i've managed to corrupt my own mother. he he.

Unknown said...

grabe drey! i wish i was that open w/ my parents or vice versa.

my mom and i can't even look at each other during (or after) a love scene in a movie...pawala lg kumbaga hahaha

come to think of it, i never had the "the birds and the bees..." or "practice safe sex" discussion with my parents

M said...

whut?! how did this happen? why is the world so unfair??? sex is such a taboo in my parents' house, it's never mentioned. never.